Today I read a blog post from a mom who entitled her post “My son has the kind of autism no one talks about” I urge you to google it and have a read.
To read this moms anguish just instilled with me again that no matter how bad we think we have it there is always someone who has it worse than us. No matter how we think we cannot cope, there is someone who cannot cope more than us. No matter how we wish we were dealt a different hand at times, there is someone who wishes they were dealt our hand!!
This mom goes on to say in her blog that the autism that is not talked about is the autism that no-one wants to see. She has a son who is aggressive towards others and therefore in turn she has had to isolate herself and her child. She goes on to tell her story how excited she was to have her son be invited to a play date but upon explaining to the other parents her child had autism to the point of sometimes being aggressive she had that date revoked.
I can only imagine this moms pain!
She had a lawsuit against them from neighbours who stated that their child caused a public nuisance. one of the plaintiffs stated that this isn’t about autism but public safety. She goes on to explain that they are wrong – it is about autism and how people just aren’t aware, as autism and behaviours go hand in hand and that once people know what autism is all about they will be able to relate.
I actually feel guilty that when my child was diagnosed with autism 8 years ago I felt as though my world had come to an end. I feel now as though I shouldn’t have been upset that he was completely mute until he was 5. I feel now that I was wrong to feel upset with his meltdowns in the shop (although mild compared to this mom). I feel bad that i decided to cut myself off from going to shops etc because I was embarrassed? As all of this was nothing compared to what this mom has had to deal with.
I was hurt by someone once telling me that i was lucky my child was mute because her neurotypical child talked too much…..I am appreciative now that him being mute was biggest hurdle i had to overcome as my child has always been affectionate and loving and he is now talking and communicating fine. This poor mom used to cringe when her child ran towards her as she didn’t know if it was a hug or him lashing out! at least I knew for certain i was always getting a hug. My heart aches for this mom as I understand how your heart longs for things….even little things.
And so…..always be thankful for what you have. There is ALWAYS someone who has it worse than you, and for most parts try to understand …… even if you don’t! And perhaps we will one day understand what most people don’t even talk about, just look a little deeper and try.